Public Accountability (Well, Sort Of)

For the last two weeks, I've been going over the past year in my Annual Review, a concept I picked up from Chris Guillebeau and the Art of Non-Conformity blog. It's been a very liberating process; I really enjoy setting goals. The problem is that I rarely stick to the goals I set and often end up disappointed, or end up achieving in ways I hadn't intended to or doing things that aren't intentionally part of my desired development.

Well, courtesy of Mr. Guillebeau, I am taking greater control of my outcomes for this year. And, thanks to all of you, my readers (the one of you that I have--thanks Angela), I am making my goals public and thus increasing accountability for their achievement.

So here's what I've been brainstorming:

Health/Fitness Goals

• Lose 20 lbs.
• Take up a new sport (tennis)
• Be able to do 100 pushups
• Be able to do 200 situps
• Establish a consistent sleep routine

Family

• Organize family exploration of Los Angeles
• Restore backyard garden
• Walk four times a week with my dad

Friends

• Organize a League vacation
• Play in an organized basketball league with the League
• Meet every Alpha Zeta's parents
• Show my gratitude to each one of my good friends in one tangible way
• Have meal dates with every Camp Kesem counselor

Service

• Log 100+ hours of community service
• Create and maintain a service blog

Spiritual

• Attend services at a mosque, synagogue, Buddhist temple, and at least (3) other Christian churches
• Join a non-denominational Bible study
• Read all of C.S. Lewis's philosophy

Academic/Learning

• Earn an 'A' on my thesis
• Earn my Bachelor's Degree
• Earn a 4.0 GPA for my last undergraduate quarter at Stanford
• Pass my CBEST
• Pass my CSET
• Score a 1540 on the GRE
• Become proficient in Spanish and in American Sign Language

Writing

• Write 50+ blog posts
• Recruit a readership of at least 1,000 for my service blog
• Take a creative writing course
• Write 250+ journal entries
• Perform (3) pieces of spoken word
• Write a 10,000-word "Nice Guy Manifesto"

Professional/Career

• Shadow/classroom aid for a teacher
• Apply to (5) fellowship opportunities

Financial (Earning)

• Establish at least (2) "non-work" income streams of at least $500 per month

Financial (Giving)

• Donate 10% of my annual income to charitable causes
• Create an income stream that is entirely philanthropic

Financial (Saving)

• Have at least $10,000 in the bank by the end of the year
• Save $5,000 for my "Special Project"

Travel

• Visit at least (5) different countries
• Complete photo tour of San Francisco
• Complete photo tour of Los Angeles
• Complete photo tour of Pacific Coast Highway in southern California

Music/Dance/Art

• Attend at least (2) performing arts events in Los Angeles
• Attend 25+ dance workshops
• Learn (5) songs on ukulele
• Create and perform an individual dance project at Stanford

Miscellaneous

• Read 30+ books
• Watch the American Film Institute's Top 100 Films
• Learn to speed-read
• Obtain my bartending license

It seems like a lot to achieve in a year, but I'm excited for all of these goals. It's likely that I'll add, subtract, and modify this list, but even having a concrete list is a huge first step for me in seeing these dreams through to fruition.

Updates to come throughout the year.

29Gifts

I stumbled upon something inspiring today. For the longest time, I wanted to start a blog on service or kindness, and while reading my favorite blogs, I found out about 29Gifts, a website that encourages readers to take on the 29Gifts Challenge. It entails mindfully giving away something (e.g. money, food, compliments, etc.) for 29 days straight in order to become more aware of the gifts we all receive and to jumpstart creativity and gratitude in our lives.

It seems like such a simple concept, but I think that it's absolutely brilliant. Too often, especially in a time when everything is instantaneous (and as a result, mostly taken for granted), we just go through the motions, even in our generosity and in our altruism. Being mindful is just as important as a benevolent action itself, because it allows you to be more aware of the good that is being done.

I think I'm going to try doing the 29Gifts challenge, starting tomorrow. Right now, it seems like a breeze, but I'm sure being mindful of the process will prove much mroe difficult (but also much more fulfilling) than I expect.

The City of Sin, Revisited

For the second time in a year (which is a lot for me), I am in Las Vegas. This place had always been more fascinating than entertaining to me, mostly because I'm too big of a chicken to gamble and going to strip clubs and shows of mostly has-been entertainers isn't appealling to me. I used to say that I hated the place, but it's starting to grow on me, which is interesting given that I find too few things amusing here.

It's a beautiful city though, if you can call it a city. It's the urban manifestation of escapism, of a place where rules can be bent because everyone's bending them, a place where past and future are forgotten.

Today I read an article in The Economist about how difficult it is to be a foreigner anywhere anymore. I think the reason that Las Vegas (or the Strip at least) is so distinct is because no matter how often you come here or how well you know the area, you're always going to be a foreigner. I feel that, in some way, everyone is trying to be someone else, or to at least escape themselves and their day-to-day situations. It's almost as if Las Vegas allows us to become expatriates of our own lives, to live differently in a world where social expectations are warped in some way.

As usual, I'm probably intellectualizing the place a lot more than I should be doing, but as an Urban Studies major, I find it interesting how similar and especially how different the notion of Las Vegas as a city is versus Los Angeles or San Francisco as a city. And I'm going to be real: I'm not here to overthink this place--I just want to win a couple of bucks playing video roulette at the Mirage.

How Many People Does It Take to Make a Difference?

"The meaning of life is to find your gift; the purpose of life is to give your gift away." -- Joy J. Golliver

I've always enjoyed cheesy motivational quotes; they always went really well with the corny leadership books that I love so much. There have been few quotes, however, that have struck me as much as the one above. I went into a Starbucks to try the new Caramel Brûlée Frappucino and Danica and I came upon this book was filled with quotes about making a difference in the world in any way you can. It obviously caught my attention because I'm into that sort of inspirational stuff, but it wasn't until I flipped the book to the back cover that I found that quote. It's so simple, but it answers two very important questions, questions that most people (including myself) believe to be asking the same thing.

It's absolutely profound how different meaning and purpose are. In fact (and I apologize in advance for going on a tangential discussion of semantics), the words "meaning" and "purpose" can have very different meanings based on one's interpretation of the quote.

According to the Oxford English dictionary, meaning can be defined as either:

1. what is meant by a word, text, concept or action (probably not the definition we're looking for)
2. implied or explicit significance (looks good)
3. importance or worthwhile quality (that works, too; probably the better of the two)

Purpose can be interpreted as:

1. the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists (my first inclination)
2. a person's sense of resolve or determination (strike one)
3. a particular requirement or consideration (strike two)

Let's examine the quote with definition #3 for meaning and definition #1 for purpose...

The quote basically states then, based on the assumed definitions, that "the worthwhile quality" of one's life is in finding one's gift(s) or talent(s). It's here that we see why "meaning" and "purpose" do not mean the same thing. Using the definition chosen for purpose, the "reason for which something (in this case, one's life) exists" is to give the discovered gift(s) away or using the talent(s) for good. Here we see that life has two distinct elements that interact with each other but that are not the same.

This is the way I see it, in layman's terms: Take, for example (and arbitrarily), a spoon. The definition of a spoon is (again, according to the Oxford English Dictionary) "an implement consisting of a small, shallow oval or round bowl on a long handle." The purpose of a spoon is to aid in eating, stirring, and serving food. Here meaning and purpose are two different things, just as they are as elements of life.

Okay, so that was probably much less fascinating than I thought it was, but that's how I see it. The purpose of every person's life is the same; it is in the meaning that we distinguish ourselves, and that's the part that I'm still having trouble with the most. What are my gifts and talents? How can I use them to fulfill my purpose in a meaningful (aha!) way?

These are the questions I'm trying to answer now, hopefully in time for the coming quarter. It's hard to give something away that you don't know you possess. Looks like I've got some soul-searching to do.

My Life in Bags and Boxes

I've moved out of Sigma Nu before. In fact, I've moved out twice, once as a sophomore and once as a junior. This place has literally been my home for the last three years of my life, and I'm moving out for what probably is the last time. And this time, it's different.

I just spent about three hours drinking and talking with Nick, Danny, and Mitchell, three of my best friends. We had some champagne, wrote the date on the bottle, and then put our wishes for ourselves in ten years in the bottle. We'll break it in ten years to see how close we came to the visions we had for ourselves now.

I don't think it's hit me yet that I'll be away from Stanford for the next four months. My optimism continues to reassure me that I'll be around, that my friendships won't be affected, and that when I get back, it'll be as if I hadn't left at all. I'm really going to miss this place, even if I'll be coming back in the spring. Stanford has always been more about the people than the academics for me, and I'm so grateful that I'm a part of Sigma Nu. I've always wanted to know what life would be like with a brother, and now I can't imaging living my life without 22 of them.

Seeing basically everything I own wrapped up and placed in bags and boxes is interesting, too. Can everything I am be compartmentalized, sorted, and packed away, ready to be shipped away into another environment? Or will I leave a little bit of myself in 557 Mayfield Avenue?

The next 14 weeks will be a great big adventure. I'm scared. What if I don't do all I set out to do? What do I want to do? There are so many questions that need answering, questions that have existed, but questions that could be put off because my Stanford friends were all my answers. Next quarter, I'm not the Vice-President of the student body; next quarter, I'm not even a Stanford student... I haven't known how to live not being either one of these things. How will I do?